I'm a proud Northerner. Born in Lancashire, raised in Lancashire and have spent some of the best years of my life in northern towns and cities including Sheffield, Halifax, Leeds and Manchester.

But apparently, I shouldn't have bothered and I should have packed up and moved to the South at the first opportunity because all of these places are doomed. Doomed because they are in the north.

That's according to the 'think tank' (although I'm not sure they did much thinking on this one) Policy Exchange who today have published their 'Cities Unlimited' report.

By their reckoning the regeneration efforts over the last few years have been of little benefit. Places like Liverpool and Sunderland have lost their 'raison d'etre' because the ports aren't as strong as they used to be.

Manchester? Well, Manchester was unlucky because it got the cotton industry whilst London got finance. Finance has blossomed whilst cotton has withered and died.

And, by extension, the 'think tank' argue that the northern towns and cities should wither and die, that investment should be put into expanding London and a.n. other south easterly located city and if we want to have more prosperous lives, we, residents of the north, should move down there.

That's because Manchester, Newcastle and Leeds don't have the 'pull' to support suburban locations such as Rochdale, Sunderland and Bradford - hmmm...I suppose I could take the daily inward migration of commuters into Manchester as a single, direct counter that statement. At a very, very basic level, if Manchester wasn't supporting the regional towns there wouldn't be gridlock on the M61, M66, M67 and M60 every morning.

I don't know about you, but I've not heard anything quite so offensive in a long time. I find this a personal affront on the cities and towns that we all live in, up here in the desolate wasteland that is the apparent destiny of the north of England.

Absolutely fuming, as I'm sure many of us are. Not surprising that the politicians are scrambling to distance themselves from this utter muppetry.

You can read the entire report here, comment from the BBC and some discussion over at The Guardian. You'll note that none of these will use the word 'muppetry'!